HEAL THAT SHIT with Alissa Buethe PODCAST Episode 4 - Hard Work
I was raised that hard work was a virtue and the only way to have success in life. This idea was absolutely ingrained into my identity.
I completely bought into the concept that hard work was the only way I was going to be successful. And the harder I worked, the more successful I would become. I was taught to do the hard things first. Work hard, then play. Eat your vegetables first. Don’t let anyone ever out hustle you. I was certainly no stranger to hard work.
But one day I reached a moment where I stood up and said, “Fuck that shit! I don’t wanna work hard!” And the second those words flew out of my mouth, this voice in my head said, “You lazy bitch.” And this overwhelming feeling of disgust washed over me.
Did I just say that?
Heal That Shit with Alissa Buethe - Episode 4: Hard Work
I spent the next several months realizing I had 2 conflicting ideas trying to live peacefully in my head and becoming aware that they could not coexist in the same space. Something had to go.
What I wanted was a peaceful life. An inspired life. A life where I get to use all of my gifts to help others. A life of joy. A life of freedom.
And I also realized in this process that this concept of hard work didn't just affect my approach to work and my career but also to my relationships.
I didn’t realize how much this mindset had carried over from my childhood into the pattern of codependent relationships. I grew up thinking I had to earn praise and affection. I had to provide value in the form of doing for others, taking care of them, being agreeable, and sacrificing my needs in order to receive love. I had to work hard for it.
I didn’t realize until just recently, how much this pattern and thought process throughout my life, in relationships, really distorted the way I looked at receiving abundance in all areas of my life. That my 10 year old mind perceived that information in childhood and applied it to every area of my life through adulthood in ways that did not serve me well.
I realize now how I misunderstood those lessons and have decided it is time for me to lay down those beliefs. At least the parts that continue to harm me or distort the way I look at the world, my relationships, and myself.
What habits, patterns or mindsets have you been questioning? What patterns, beliefs or mindsets from childhood could use the insight of your adult self? What new awareness have you been gifted? What are you ready to let go of because it no longer serves who you are becoming?